Eating Muffins

Halme Polvinen Family Collective. You will all be assillymated

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  • We had a blogiversary!

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    Posted by Sari

    And we completely missed it. Jukka was in Stockholm enjoying the company of Norwegian Star Trek fen, and I was working and when I wasn’t I was knitting my cardigan and watching season 5 Buffy. Anyway, Muffins is now a year old. Which necessarily means a dull introspective metapost about the nature of blogging.

    Blogging is a balancing act between narcissistic need to write and paralyzing fear of people actually reading what you write. We (or rather I, because Jukkahoo never has these issues) have solved this dilemma thus far by being sort of semi-public. That is, the site is not password protected and if somebody links to us that is just fine and dandy, but at the same time we are not listed at Pinseri Bloglist, don’t have a blogroll and the site is not syndicated. This has allowed us (me) maintain my illusion that the site is read only by friends and family and thus given me freedom to write posts that are like diary entries or posts that are really not that analytical or thought through, and posts about obscure and uninteresting things like rubber boots and figure skating and most of all, the posts have been full of my quirkily endearing language mistakes. But that is a sort of an excuse. Even in Finland, there are so many so different kinds of blogs from Kanerva’s diary and its beautiful prose to very specialised linky blogs that the format allows all sorts of things.

    I was also a bit dubious about this blogging thing because, you know, university, teacher, position of authority and all that. But that is a bit lame, other much more distinguished academic fen blog so that excuse does not really wash.  My last line of defence was the fact that Muffins has a nice amount of comments compared to many other blogs and the site being "more public" might somehow affect that negatively. Jukka said pshaw.

    So here I am, thinking why I am doing this if I don’t actually want readers except I kinda do, but… 

    Edited to add a link and congrats to Kaikkiruokainen on the anniversary of his most excellent blog

  • The Wellington Odyssey

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    Posted by Sari

    No, we are not talking about the Duke of, but his more mundane namesakes, plain ordinary wellies. See, come atumn I, like all good Finns, like do the gathering part of the hunter-gatherer life. Grab a knife, basket, big black bin liner, a brush and a map, and off you go to pick berries and mushrooms. Lovely. Except for two things: elk flies and boggy ground.

    For the first scourge pretty much all you can do is cover your hair and ears really tight and hope for the best, for the latter good oldfashioned rubber boots are the thing. I mean, you can do without, but after sinking to wet mossy ground up to mid-calf in my trainers last time I went into a mushroom (that, believe it or not,  is a literal translation of of you say it in Finnish you either go picking mushrooms – mennä poimimaan sieniä or you go into a mushroom – mennä sieneen), I decided a pair of wellies would indeed better the quality of my life. You know, just a pair of cheap ordinary wellies to tramp around in the woods for a bit, nothing special.

    Little did I know how the fates would treat my modest ambition to own a pair. After being scorned by the Light of My Life for planning to start looking for wellies at Stockmann, the Harrods of Helsinki, I decided to shed my bourgeois upbringing, and start the search from Anttila, the Walmart of Finland.  And I did find some: bright red designer wellies 30€ a pair. Yeah right, like I am going to pay 200 grannies for rubber boots. Next stop Stockmann.  And they did have wellies, oh yes they did.  Nokia Outdoor, Nokia All Around, Nokia Pro… Not to mention the real designer items like Marimekko poppy wellies. And prices to match with all the marvellous qualities they are supposed to have. But no ordinary "I am just going to slip these on and nip over to the woods next door to pick some blueberries for a pie" -type of boots in sight.

    Then I went to two different InterSports, Aleksi 13, and finally to Tarjoustalo. The last, the K-Mart of Finland, did have the right price range €5.90, but only sizes available were 35 and 46. So after two hours, no wellies. My next master plan was to go native and shop for wellies at a nice pictoresque shopping centre in Mäntyharju, ’cause, obviously people who buy cheap ordinary wellingtons live in the country, right? Unfortunately, doubt hangs over this bold plan as well, as my spies in Northern Carelia tell me that there was a serious lack of wellies in local stores. And if that is the case, I dread what the situation might be in Southern Savonia… The quest continues.

    Oh, and surfing for the links for this post was very educational. Have you any idea how many p0rn sites for rubber b00t feti$hists there are? The mind boggles.

  • Surreal experiences

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    Posted by Sari

    Have you ever tried to read 17th century religious pamphlets while listening to Bauhaus? You should try, there a really strange ‘dissonant harmony’ in the experience.

  • Picnic on the Roadside

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    Posted by jukkahoo

    Last Saturday we finally saw the welcoming return of the Picnic on the Roadside (Huviretki tienpientareelle) happen. This had been an annual (almost) ritual-like gathering of Finndom from the Days Immemorial, but due to various reasons it managed to wither away. Until this year, that is, and a good thing it is too.

    Tampere has always been one of the Four Big Ones, besides Helsinki, Turku and Jyväskylä. Turku is the oldest one, Helsinki the strongest and Jyväskylä has been quite efficient considering both the size of the city and the fandom there, but somehow they have (with a little help from Jyväskylän Kesä) managed to become a monumentally important sf-city. Whereas Tampere used to be Really big, floundered a bit but was still the home of Portti, until recently SPEKTRE has brought new life and vitality to the sf side of the city.

    I had a bit of a monetary situation and almost missed the party, but luckily familjen Hiltunen-Parviala had decided to participate and they had a seat for me in their car. Shure, it was a hotseat since the A/C was broken (and thought that it was winter outside) but I don’t think my hair was that much damaged, zinged mostly.

    We narrowedly managed to miss the 1PM boat to Viikinsaari, but I and Petri were more than able to spent the intermittent 50 minutes at nearby fleamarket. Radio-kirppis is an expensive, boring place, with little or no sf-interest. Then again I didn’t have that much cash with me. €1 for the one book I bought was quite OK.

    It was a nice meeting. There was Hinkkanen and Rantalaiho of the Tampere Elders, some SPEKTRE actives (besides Liisa, that is) like Frans, Erkka and Ari (and then some, but there was no formal introductory round so apologies to you all not listed here – one of you is Jukka, so hi to you!). Turku had a fearsome foursome of Ben, Susanna, Tero and Johanna (not the famous literary person, but the new editor of Spin – or is she? Apparently not, as we can read from the pages of the latest ish of the said fanzine. How did I err then? Must have been something someone said) and then Jyväskylä came in the forms of Ipa and Jussi. Capital area was also represented by Toni, Vesa and jautero. I did see Soikkeli and his muse, but they vanished pretty much the moment the 2PM boat got here. No connection I hope?

    Contrary to popular belief (and maybe even against all hopes) there was no football match between Helsinki and Turku, but a veritable show of flying objects. I was somewhat dissapointed, when my second attempt with the Death Star was not considered to be the winner in the cathegory of the Longest Flight. Yes it was Ben’s design, but I did throw it the longest. Goddamn it! I have no quarrels with the other winners, though I do think that Vanishing Lady did the most excellent double-flips in the air. But Petri did manage to land his plane to the tree, so: fair cop.

    Our stay was cut short by the fact that Tuisku really was getting a bit tired, fact that was proven correct on the way back, since it was way past 10PM before even I was at home.

    I had fun, hopefully I’ll have fun the next time too. This ought to become the tradition it used to be. Next time I’ll find me a place to stay for the night too. I understand this year the land-based partying was somewhat mild, due to the relatively low attendance as well as the fear of bar-stomping crowd of all those people at the Eppu Normaali concert in Ratina. Apparently the last train to Helsinki was rather… full. Toni reports that it took him about an hour to get his first beer from the restaurangvagn. Tough.

    Thank you, RESPEKT! See you next time.

  • Where is Pöljä?

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    Posted by jukkahoo

    Some time ago (not that long actually) a survey was made. A lot of them are made every day, I’m shure, but this one made the headlines since apparently young Finns didn’t know where prominent Finnish cities and counties are. Sela!

    Regional Development minister Hannu Manninen (Rural ie. hilly-billy) took a similar test, where he was given names of ten towns or cities and asked to place them on a blank Finnish map. I can’t remember his result, but apparently he did relatively OK.

    I was happily surprised to see that the test was also available in the net at Kuntavisa.

    Since I am possibly one of the three most ignorant persons I know in the field of Finnish geography, I was decidedly surprised to see that I didn’t do all that bad. I was off by mere 3041 km’s! Most of it was due three locations, which I managed to pflergb up pretty solidly. Who the [four-letter-word] knows where Homeperseensuo is? 1000 km wide of the mark on that one. Kypärävaara by 625 and Utajärvi by 423. I almost nailed Pöljä (58!) and Järvenpää (24). And before you start laughing about my Järvenpää miss, check out the site itself. I’d say 30 km is a fair cop considering the size of the map and the near-infallibility of a mouse-click.

    This was of course the version with the most locations. I scored considerably better my second attempt when I hit only 1726 km’s off the mark. Then again, I managed to put Helsinki in the wrong end of a cape. I guess that this was the actual test minister Manninen did too, since this one was the one with the Finnish towns and cities (all 444 of them), whereas the first one I did had some additional locations to it (520). Not that bad, though I blundered with the last one: Kiikala (off by 477 km). I actually did know where it roughly lies, but my mousepad was slightly bent and thus I veered off considerably. Well, 350-400 km’s I’d say.

    Then I decided to try an easy one: only 75 Most Easiest Locations…

    My aim was off by mere 531 km’s!!! I totally blew Orivesi (off by 138) as well as Joensuu (79) and Kuopio (68). Järvenpää was off only by 13 and Tornio by measily 7 km’s. Well within the (my own personal error-margin approval of) 30 km’s. Jämsä was off by only 38! I really need to take this one again!

    And voila! This time I was off by pitiful 290. Almost nailed Tornio and Kauniainen (off by 9), with Sipoo, Turku, Jämsä, Oulunsalo, Kerava and Kangasala within my 30 km error-margin. Hämeenkyrö on the other hand…

    I decided to have a one more go, with cities (111 of them) only. Off by 909 km’s. Anjalankoski off by more than 300 – and then I nailed Kannus (3!!!). Sigh. This is addicting.

    This weekend sees the resurrection of the old Viikinsaari picnic tradition (Picnic on the Roadside it was Then called, when the dinosaurs roamed the Earth and Finndom). I’d like to go, but it looks somewhat doubtful unless I can arrange somekind of a deal with my brother and a volunteer driver. Then it’s time for Swecon.

    But there’s more!

    TamFan takes place in mid-September. Tamfan

    Turku Book Fair has Alastair Reynolds in early October and Helsinki Book Fair has… well Sjón, apparently.

    I’d like to attend both of these; especially see Al again and participate this one panel in Helsinki, but the latter one may not happen since there’s also this little thing calles Snorfcon in Copenhagen at the same time. I’d like to be there too, you see.

    Read fafblog! It’s the bestest blog in the whole world.

  • Truth about Swift Boats

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    Posted by Sari

    There is something addictive about the theatre that is US politics. The latest brouhaha which competes with "Withe House blew the cover of an Al-Qaida double agent" over the attention in the media seems to be about a bunch of vets claiming Kerry’s service record is not quite as shiny as it is depicted.

    I mention this only because I want to link to one of my favourite blogs Fafblog,  a blog about "god and the universe and those horrible screaming monkeys and that time I made a pizza out of an old tire and a can of whip cream" where Giblets, Fafnir and Medium Lobster set the record straight. Witness Giblets on Kerry

  • No surprises there

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    Posted by Sari

    Lord of the rings
    J.R.R. Tolkien: Lord of the Rings. You are
    entertaining and imaginative, creating whole
    new worlds around yourself. Well loved, you
    have a whole league of imitators, none of which
    is quite as profound as you are. Stories and
    songs give a spark of joy in the middle of your
    eternal battle with the forces of evil.

    Which literature classic are you?
    brought to you by Quizilla

  • Olen lomalla – I’m on Holiday

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    Posted by jukkahoo

    Lopetin työnteon viime perjantaina ja olen siitä lähtien aktiivisesti pyrkinyt lepäämään. Lomamatka Mäntyharjulle auttoi aika tavalla, sillä mikäs sen rentouttavampaa kuin pitkä viikonloppu keskellä metsää (järven rannalla tosin) ja tarpeeksi rillattavaa makatraa. Ja Teemu Naarajärvi.

    Oli siellä noita Polvisen sisaruksiakin.

    Katsotaan kuinka pitkäksi tämä loma lopulta päätyy. Pahimmassa tapauksessa menen töihin jo ensi maanantaina (Itäkeskuksen työvoimatoimistoon), mutta mikäli pärstäkertoimeni ei miellyttänyt (eikä se työpaikkahaastattelu nyt aivan putkeen ehkä mennytkään) niin sitten tulee lomailtua hieman pitempään.

    Mäntyharjun matkan paras puoli oli kuitenkin se, että sain taas lukemisen päästä kiinni. Olen vuosien hitaasti eteenpäin rutistellessa huomannut itsestäni sellaisen ongelman, että joskus en vain yksinkertaisesti saa luetuksi kirjoja. Sivut tuntuvat tahmeilta ja teksti ei pidä muassaan lainkaan. Se olotila kestää useimmiten sellaisen kuukauden-puolitoista. Jossain vaiheessa mokomakin tilanne herpaantuu ja kirjailijan teksti alkaa vain luistaa ja sivu kääntyä kuin itsestään.

    Siinä välillä tulee luetuksi kyllä erilaisia lehtiä ja jopa lyhyttä fiktiota, mutta mikään kirjan muotoon puettu ei uppoa. EI vaikka olisi kuinka sitä parasta mahdollista laatua tai tuttua huttua, hubalukemista tai reipasta seikkkailuviihdettä. Faktakirjallisuudesta nyt puhumattakaan.

    Tämänkertainen kuivan kauden lopettaja oli Harold Schechterin Nevermore. Kummallinen, erilainen ja kohtuullisen hauska sarjamurhaajamysteeri 1800-luvun alkupuolen Baltimoresta. Schechter on kirjallisuuden proffa ja tehnyt enimmäkseen (get this!) tosirikos-kirjoja (nk. nimistä Deprieved, Bestial ja Deviant voi päätellä) hirmuisista sarja/massamurhaajista. Nevermore on kuitenkin puhdasta fiktiota ja kuten nimestä voisi päätellä, on Edgar Allan Poella jotain tekemistä asian kanssa. Itse asiassa hän ratkoo versiä murhia yhdessä… (get this!) Davy Crockettin kanssa!!! Tenneesseeläinen kansanedustaja ja rajamies on pesukarhulakkeineen sekä Paul Bunyonin kokoisen itsetunnon kanssa varustettuna matkannut kauas Baltimoreen hieman “keskustelemaan” omaelämäkertansa sikäläisessä lehdessä teilanneen nuoren herra Poen kanssa.

    Schechter kirjoittaa Poen näkökulmasta ja aikas hurjan hauskasti sen tekeekin. Poe on lähes yhtä epäluotettava kertoja kuin paroni Münchausen (jonka raati viime viikonloppuna julisti kaikkien aikojen epäluotettavimmaksi kertojaksi), mutta yhdistelmä Poen omaa ääntä ja itselleen valehtelevaa pelkuria tempaa lukijan mukaansa alkupuolen pienen epäuskoisuuden jälkeen. Schechter ei ole aivan maailman paras kirjailija, mutta hauskoja yksityiskohtia ja Poen (sekä Crockettin) elämää tuntevana ja kirjallisia kikkoja osaavana tekijänä hän pallottelee kiitettavän onnistuneesti hyvän ja huonon maun rajapinnalla. Vielä kun joku olisi ottanut kursiivin pois miehen kirjoituskoneesta, niin… Schechter näyttäisi kirjailleen tälle myös jatkoa (Hum-Bug), joka saattaisi hyvinkin siirtyä omistukseeni jos sen jostain näppeihini saisin.

    Finnconin laineet eivät lyöneet jälkikäteen kovinkaan korkeina. Yleinen ja yhtäläinen konsensus lienee siis se, että kyseessä oli hyvä con. Niin minustakin. Olen kirjaillut pientä raporttia lontoon kielellä, mutta en ole saanut sitä vielä valmiiksi. Jos vaikka tässä lomalla?

    Asunnossamme kävi myös pyörremyrsky Kuutti, joka roiskaisi parisataa nauhoitettua vhs-kasettia lattialle. Tarkoituksena on siirtää mokomat tilanhukkaajat (ja erityisesti katsomattomat nauhat) roskiin. Kaikkea sitä onkin tullut aikanaan nauhoittaneeksi. Vuosia vanhoja kasetteja täynnä elokuvia ja tv-sarjoja, joita ei ole tullut koskaan katsoneeksi. Sitä itsepetoksen määrää. Ihan niin kuin ne kaikki lukemattomat kirjat kirjahyllyssä, joita ei ole koskaan lukenut tai edes aio… No niin, eipäs nyt kuitenkaan mennä liian pitkälle tässä ajatusmallissa. Onhan nyt kirjalla ja nauhoitetulla videokasetilla nyt sentään merkittävä ero. Krhm.

    Kröhöm.

    As said. I’m on holiday. Future looks uncertain, but I’m stille entertaining a possibility of going to Swecon (Stocholm) in less than three weeks time (20.-22. 8.). I have paid my entrance fee, but now it all depends on accommodation. It should be cheap. Very cheap. Well, free actually. That I can afford. We’ll see.

  • Reading update

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    Posted by Sari

    You might have noticed that what we are reading sidebar has not been updated for some time. It isn’t that we (or at least I – I can’t speak for Mr.Hoo here) have not been reading, it is just that of those particular books I managed to finish just one, the history of Alphabet by John Man. And that was a truly fun book, for once a popular science book (history and linguistics) which was fun and informative to read even though I already have the basics. And what a versatile and strange thing the alphabet is.

    I did finsih Malcolm Brown’s The Imperial War Museum Book of Western Front which goes through the major events on the front concentrating almost solely on primary sources and tries to give the contemporary view of the fighting. The book is well constructed and handles all the themes you might wish for, but it is bit short on the interpretation. Brown like Macdonald wants to let the sources speak for themselves, which makes the whole a bit disjointed and quote-heavy. Besides, “letting the sources speak” is a sort of an illusion. In the end the quotes are selected by the historian and making the interpretation more transparent might have made a better book.

    Same can be said of Andrew Birkin’s much lauded book on J.M. Barrie and his five adopted sons, J.M. Barrie and the lost Boys. The story of how Barrie befrended the Llewellyn Davies kids and how their summer games became the origins of Never-never-land is so strange and so very sad and potentially a bit sinister that the subject-matter alone guarantees a interested audience. Birkin, like Brown quotes extensively from letters and diaries but his light touch is sometimes annoying.

    A good example is the death of Sylvia Llewellyn Davies which left the boys orphaned. Sylvia had written an informal “will” of what she hoped would happen if she died, and in it she said “What I would like wd be if Jenny wd come to Mary & that the two together would be looking after the boys & house helping each other”. Mary was children’s Nanny and Jenny her sister. J.M. Barrie transcribed the “will” as “What I would like wd be if Jimmy…” Birkin says that it was undoubtably a mistake and that with or without the “will” the only possible guardian would in any case been Barrie, but considering how possessive JMB was of the boys even when their parents were alive I would have liked a bit more discussion on the point. In any case, you never read Peter Pan in quite the same way again after this book.

    Tarja was also kind enough to drop me some fluff to read while trying to get over this darn flu. This time it was an omnibus of the first three Stephanie Plum novels by Janet Evanovich. And very nice fluff it was indeed. Stephanie is a fledling bounty hunter working for his cousin Vinny in Trenton, NJ. She has a number of eccentric relations like grandma Mazur who likes to go to funeral parlors to view the bodies, mysterious mentor Ranger and handsome but annoying cop for a friend. No brains needed for this, and the detectin’ aspect of the novels is not that complex, but very very entertaining reads anyhow. Tarja, next ones, please.

    And speaking of fluff, I also read (ahem…) Devin Grayson’s Smallville tie-in novel City. She is better at writing comics. Subtextually borderline slashy, captures the characters well enough, but as there is just so much you can’t change because of the plot of the TV-series that in the end the novel is an empty excercise.

    And to redeem myself somewhat lets finish with Gwynneth Jones interesting and thought provoking collection of essays on SF, Deconstructing Starships. I am not sure I agree with her on on the impact of poststructuralism on science, fiction and science fiction, but both her reviews and articles certainly give food for thought. And she likes J.C Cherryh who is also one of my absolute favourites and pretty much for same reasons. I scribbled a lot to the marigins, maybe someday I can manage a more coherent review.

  • Sick as a dog

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    Posted by Sari

    At Finncon and sick. Blah. I had to cancel on the Feminist SF panel yesterday because I had no voice. And I mean absolutely no voice I went around the con area whispering to people. Also, I was more preoccupied by the question why Finnish flu medicines are so crap compared to US and British ones than on any SF-related questions. Give me Sudafed or Lemsip anyday. Today, I am a better: nose not so blocked, I have not gotten my voice back but aqcuired somewhere this very nice low and sexy one instead. I am still feeling weak and wobbly, so I am going to take it veeeery slooowly today too.

    My memories of the con itself are a bit blurry. Lots of girls in anime costumes, a panel about internet, Toni drinking Pepsi and claiming he decides what is SF and what isn’t och en svenskspråkig panel. And a panel with lots of pictures of naked women.

    Jukka is off at the con-site already as he is somehow again managed to gather a huge numer of stuff to do: he opened the con, arranged a table ice-hockey tournament, is in charge of the Jordan caber tossing and an SF quiz show. He is also chairing a panel at some point… Me I am just going to walk slowly to the con site, maybe see some programs, talk with people and try to stay on my feet.