Eating Muffins

Halme Polvinen Family Collective. You will all be assillymated

Somebody _has_ to do it

Posted by jukkahoo

Last weekend was a Great Feast of some Appallingly Bad Movies. There are motion pictures men are not actually meant to see. That’s why some strong, silent types, the very ones that keep this planet sane and whole, are needed, in order for the rest of you to live your daily humdrum in relative easy and peace of mind.

Have you ever seen a movie starring Fabio? Or a Pakistani horror musical? Or a film starring William Shatner, Ernst Borgnine, John Travolta and Tom Skerrit, where the last twenty minutes contain mostly devilworshippers melting in the rain, in a very graphic way? Or a movie with over 500-year old giant conqistador, that snaps out of his deep slumber and starts to terrorise Southern California? Or a cheapo remake of a really cheapo barbarian movie, where the most impressive bits are the ones they ripped from the original movie, ghastly bad Deathstalker? Or how about something weird and far-out, like Queen Kong, a movie that was released 25-years after it was made and features not only female Giant Ape, but is also a musical, a comedy, a feminist spectacle and stars a skinny little blond guy as Ray Fay? Or…

Needless to say, the films in question were very entertaining and should be consumed with maximum amounts of alcoholic beverages. Beer is the best, but cheap whisky is a jolly good "kyytipoika".

21 movies in 48 hours. Not a lot of sleep. Tired now.

I finished with the The Assassins of Tamurin by S. D. Tower. She (the author) is apparently an internationally published author of espionage thrillers. Good for her. The book was a mixed bag of good ideas and solid writing, and some silly padding plus mediocre plotting. I have never liked books that tell "what is going to happen next" in two lines and then take fifty pages in order to "flesh it out".

But I was more pleased than aggravated with this one. It reads a lot like a romantic YA novel, but is a bit more "adult" than that. I liked most of the characters, even thou not that many were "fleshed out" enough (the protagonist was good). Little bit of everything you’d expect from a fantasy novel was in this one. The setting "sounded" more like Far East, than it actually "felt" like, but it was a pleasantly different from the "normal" pseudo medieval setting of phat phantasy. Recommended with slight reservations, entertaining.

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